So last night I had this dream that I was watching my wife put on a certain piece of clothing. This morning when we wake up I tell her about the dream and she gives me a puzzled look and says “That’s wierd because I drempt that I was putting on that very thing and you were watching me.”

I figure there are three possibilities; 1). One of us was talking in our sleep influencing the suconscious mind of the other and thus inducing a dream. 2). Being that we are one, we have gotten mentally aligned so that we can actually share dreams [anyone big into metaphysics?] 3). Considering the vast majority of our dreams have absolutely nothing to do with each other’s dreams it was just a strange coincidence.

Today I went to PPP and helped my secretary get started on her first sponsored post. Then I went to mine and checked on the available sponsors. There was only one, it was a $15 post but it was for a gambling site. No thank you. I just have my limits as to what I’ll talk about for moolah, which is a good thing I think.

How is it that an animal that can snatch a fast moving deflated basketball out of the air 5 feet off the ground when you kick it over their head and is able to make the immense mathematical calculations that this requires is unable to realize that when it wraps it’s chain around a pole it needs to go back the other way?

Dog: “Hmmm I seem to have gotten tangled around this pole when I went around it. What should I do? I know! I’ll go around it again in the same direction. Hmmm. I now seem to be tangled even worse. What should I do now? I know, I go around it again in the same direction. [choke] ugh that didn’t work very well, I guess I should try it again.”

The thing is, I think every dog on the planet does this same thing, and further more I think there should be a study commissioned to see if they all go in the same direction. Mine goes clockwise.

I left GCC last night after exposing some Germans to a worship time they had never dreamed existed (we then showed them around the building to their astonishment) and as we were driving down the street right in front of the church a large pickup truck smashed into the car in front of it destroying the rear end. The car proceeded to pull over to the side of the road. The truck on the other hand decided it was time to head for the hills. Problem was, the driver was so drunk that he couldn’t tell the road from the hills. He tried to make his escape over into the Target parking lot but drove over the landscaping by mistake. At first I thought maybe he was injured and was just trying to get off the road but then he kept gunning it, even with a flat front tire, he proceeded to smash his way through the landscaping and into the parking lot. I tossed my cell phone to Kathy and told her to call 911 and I gave chase. I stayed on the road and paralleled him in the parking lot. He drove up over the lawn and onto main street heading north going back and forth between hitting every curb, shrub, landscaping stone and nicely manicured lawn to the street and back again until he pulled into a bank parking lot and got stuck on the landscaping between the in and out lanes. I got close enough for Kathy to tell the operator the licence plate. I then backed off and watched as this now demolished remains of a truck actually got off the large stone it was hung up on, backed toward us and then took off again across the parking lot, where he nicely impacted a light pole and came to rest. Just when we though he was done, he backed it up again (by this time the front end was smashed and carrying a small shrub, both front tires were flat and one was broken and at about a 45 degree angle, the engine was leaking fluids and steam/smoke was coming from the engine compartment). The guy backs up, turns and places the truck neatly in a parking space and then gets out, looks at his truck and seems to be thinking “yeah, that looks good. No one will notice anything.” and proceeds to try to run away without success since the entire planet is now crooked and wobbling to him. He gets to the edge of the parking lot and either realizes he is too drunk to run or he doesn’t think he can make it across the intersection of main and cleveland. So he decideds to go back for the truck. As he is trying to put his keys in the door (I guess he remembered to lock up when he left) I put my window down and shouted to him in my best ex-MP voice “Sir, do not attempt to get back in your vehicle!” I think he thought I was the cops because he nodded that he understood and then turned and just stood there as best he could in the violent heaving of the waves under the parking lot. at this point the police arrived, about 5 of them. I gave my information to one officer and told them about the original accident over by GCC, so they sent another car over there. All in all it was quite exciting.

Like PayPerPost changing how they set up things for the advertisers. There has not been a post that my xanga site has qualified for in over a week. Today and yesterday there was one post each day that I qualify for, but of course so does every other joe blow with a xanga so all of the available posts had been taken already by the loosers without lives who sit on the internet all night long just waiting for an available post to pop up. This totally blows. I haven’t made a dime in a week!

What do you expect from such simple creatures? Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding plans take care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack. You can be President. You can never be pregnant. You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO shirt to a water park. Car mechanics tell you the truth.

The world is your urinal. You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky. You don’t have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt. Same work, more pay. Wrinkles add character. Graying hair adds attraction. Wedding dress~$5000. Tux rental~$100. People never stare at your chest when you’re talking to them. The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected. New shoes don’t cut, blister, or mangle your feet. One mood all the time. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You know stuff about tanks.

A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase. You can open all your own jars. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend. Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack. Three pairs of shoes are more than enough. You almost never have strap problems in public. You are unable to
see wrinkles in your clothes.

Everything on your face stays its original color. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades. You only have to shave your face and neck. You can play with toys all your life. Your belly usually hides your big hips. One wallet and one pair of shoes one color for all seasons. You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look. You can “do” your nails with a pocket knife You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache. You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.

No wonder men are happier.